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Are you sure you don’t want to get a studio for yourself or live with a friend before making this commitment? We have had many fights about the marijuana because I am concerned for his wellbeing.He and I disagree on whether the drug itself is beneficial, and so with him I mostly focus on the fact that not-oxygen is entering his lungs, shortening his lifespan (and his Married Friend is concerned about the getting faded).If you have to say something, say Then stop talking. Yeah.) So if someone is willing to actually talk with you about this, chances are it is an investment having a better relationship with you, not a drive-by insult-fest or attack designed to tear you down and make you feel terrible and hate yourself.Definitely stop typing in that little social media window. They are talking to you about it because they want you to get it and to stop doing the hurtful thing so that they can keep working with/hanging out with you.The people who hate your guts or think you’re a lost cause will just avoid you. (Don’t take my word for it or get distracted by whether any of these are the Perfect One.There are worse things you could do than just listen without interrupting. Do research and find something that works for you.) For today, here are your steps if you should make a mistake and say or do something racist: I have a friend who I care about dearly but he keeps sending quite rude (almost downright racist) messages over a group chat I have with all of my friends, often targeted towards me and my heritage.I think my messages are just messed up at the moment”) so I’m afraid to tell them because these kinds of jokes are often made by him so that’s partly why no one goes “hey that’s not cool, friend.” I don’t want to be seen as humourless by telling everyone, because then people treat me like they’re walking on eggshells. The time zone difference means that I’m often giving up prime social hours to talk with her, so this is pretty upsetting.When we last saw each other, it was for much less time than we planned.

The saying about misogyny goes: Welp, white people are worried about being unfairly called racist and feeling weird about it. I used to be bullied for having “foreigner” relatives and being related to said country and his behaviour is similar to how it started out when I first was bullied (by other people, to clarify) which is making alarm bells ring.

Step 2, after that initial encounter, instead of trying to justify or excavate why whatever it is isn’t racist or isn’t “really” racist or wasn’t meant to be racist or isn’t usually racist or is racist only on Tuesdays, think about why it racist. A recent example is that he sent a photo of a map from almost 200 years ago and said “Ha, look, your country isn’t even on this map!

(Think about this quietly, inside your head.) Why might someone see it that way? How might your action look to someone who doesn’t know about your pure heart and good intentions, somebody who experiences the same “mistakes” and “slip-ups” over and over again from white people? It’s not a real country lol.” Another was when he kept trying to explain and then lecture me (quite patronizingly) about this country’s history (with inaccurate information, if I may add that) although I have family from this country and have read books about its history.

It was pretty upset and told her that I was tired of excuses and apologies and promises to do better.

It’s been two years and it all just feels like empty words.

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People of color are worried about dying (in medical situations, at the hands of police, from environmental racism, etc. etc.) The history of racism is complex enough and insidious enough that chances are: There are steps after that. As it is on a group chat and I struggle with anxiety and confronting my friends (he knows this), then I find it difficult to call him out on his behaviour and I try to ignore the group chat, however, I feel like if I constantly ignore it every time people accept this behaviour more and it hinders my ability to communicate online to my group of friends (also, they know I get upset about it but I don’t expect them to do anything).

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